Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
