some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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