butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
