nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
you mean i was at the winter classic?
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
