Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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