i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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