Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
