hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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