I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Randomize
