And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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