someone threw a dead crab at me
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize
