I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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