I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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