My nipple is on Facebook.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
