remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Randomize
