problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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