For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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