what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
