Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
My dad just said "fuck circus"
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Randomize
