I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
