We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
