you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize