It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
