Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize