im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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