Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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