why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
