so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
