OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
