i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
