Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
