Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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