Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
