The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
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