im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
