it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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