dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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