I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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