his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
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