Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
