He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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