I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Sorry my hands just texted you
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
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