so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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