She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Randomize
