they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
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