we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize
