Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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