READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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