I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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