Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
even my farts smell like vagina
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize