Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
