"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
i think my cat just said my name.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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